OCTOBER, 2005 - After the past hellish two years, losing seven family members, fighting my own bad health resulting in two surgeries and just trying to drag my ass out of bed each morning, I put House Of Pain on the back burner for a while. I took on a helper last year, Nickolaus Pacione, to help with the editing and formatting of stories and he did help quite a bit. I managed to add some new work but I was no where near satisfied with where I was going with House Of Pain anymore. I didn't have the time or energy to give it the attention it needs.

   I still don't, in fact I have even less time now, between running our own businesses, daily life and trying to keep myself moving every day. I had made plans to have a new issue up by mid-March and there it was, mid-March and I didn't even have the motivation to start working on anything. I had just gotten back home after three weeks of taking care of my very ill mom (who fortunately recovered completely) and I had an upcoming surgery in May that had a six week recovery time (which I fortunately recovered from).

   So, I made a decision. It was not an easy one to make but for me, it was the only one. It weighed heavy on my mind. I had about 70 stories that had been sent in over the past few months sitting here and authors that needed a place to go. I know I had loyal readers who I was letting down but I'd come to one conclusion. I couldn't do this any more. At least not right now.

   The site will stay up, the archives will remain, in fact everything will still be here except for new fiction. Some day I may get the urge and energy again but right now the only urge I have is to sleep, sit outside at sundown watching the desert and feed he jackrabbits that I've adopted. Maybe when I make it through all this and get myself back again I'll start back up if there's still those out there who need me.

   I want to thank everyone that has contributed over the years. I want to thank all those people who cheered me on when I needed it the most and talked me out of giving it up in the past. It's been very fulfilling to know that many of the authors that I gave a first start to are now being published and I'd like to think that I helped give them the boost they needed to get out there and try harder by having their work accepted here.

   I also want to thank all the readers that kept me going for the past ten years and gave me the will to keep it up, because I hate letting people down. I'd like to think that there will be some people out there that will miss the new fiction, that looked forward to it and to them I say I'm sorry. I've spent ten years taking care of my House Of Pain, right now I have to concentrate on taking care of me.

Dark Blessings!
Brigit